Sex

While I'm forever grateful that social networking has brought me into contact with friends and family I never thought I'd see or talk to again... Facebook is the devil. 

When my husband decided to tell me that he was done with our marriage he also served up the information that he'd been talking to someone (a stranger) in a Facebook group & had she agreed to meet up with him he'd have fucked her. 

Now, you'd think I'd be pissed off by this, right? 

The reason I'm not a jealous person is because I understand what makes people cheat.  I'm a cheater.  Was a cheater.  It's kind of like being an alcoholic.  You're always an alcoholic even if you no longer participate.  It gives you a level of understanding that someone who doesn't "drink" could never have.

So, what pisses me off about this ISNT that my husband was trolling Facebook for a piece of ass or that he almost (allegedly) slept with someone else. 

I'm pissed at the fact that during 8 years of our 10 year relationship I've had to beg for sex & normally was turned down.  I understand that I'm not the hottest wife on the planet.  I get that I wake up with bad breath & need to shave my legs daily.  I know I can be hard to live with several days of the month.  What human isn't? 

Never once did he complain about the sex.

So why did he go looking for it elsewhere when he's the #1 reason we didnt have this intimate relationship in the first place?


I have so many questions that I'll never have answers to.